Get Off The Porch!!!

Sometime ago, I read a story about a man that had an old dog. All day the dog just sat on the porch and moaned! The man couldn't figure out why the dog was so sad! He had plenty of food, he had water and he appeared to be pretty healthy. But day in and day out he sat in the same spot and moaned! Finally when the man could no longer take the dog's moaning, he went out on the porch and ran the dog off of the porch. Much to his surprise, once he had removed the dog from the porch, he discovered the source of the dog's misery. There was a nail coming up from the bottom of the floor board of the porch! The poor dog was lying on a nail!

You may have some questions about this story, such as: How did the nail get in the porch? Why was the dog lying on the nail? Why didn't the dog just remove himself from the nail? ...etc. None of these questions really matter, do they?

I have a better question? Are you moaning? And if you are, is it because you're sitting on a nail?

Okay! Then:

GET OFF THE PORCH!!!!!

I bet you feel better already!!